Just A Girl.

I’m just a girl.1Just a girl from a small town in Oklahoma. Just a girl who was raised in the oilfield and on the land. Just a girl who loves more than she fights and has never met a stranger.

Just a girl who is kind and has a heart too big for this cruel world.

I’m just a girl who is 100% authentic in herself…and that’s no longer good enough.

I’m almost 6 foot tall; all legs and a short crooked torso. I wear a t-shirt, jeans and boots almost every day and my “dressed up” is probably less fancy than society’s version of “dressed down” for a 20-something woman these days. I lost my boobs to fitness and I don’t even own a dress. I do love to fix my hair and play in makeup from time to time – but this still just isn’t good enough for this feminist driven society.

Girl power. *insert eye roll here*

I get dirty…a lot, because my job requires it. I’m not afraid to work, never have been. I was shoveling shit on a ranch before I could drive, earning my keep that led me to be the horseman I am today. I love to go out in the field and come home at the end of the day filthy and exhausted because I busted my ass.

I also love to come home at the end of that day and throw some laundry in, whip up dinner and make sure the house is in order. There’s just something about the smile on a mans face when dinner is almost ready when he gets home.

SHOOT ME!

I’m not a feminist.

I.

AM.

NOT.

A.

FEMINIST!

You bet your ass I think a woman’s place is in the kitchen.You bet your ass I think it’s a woman’s duty to be the sole homemaker.You can also bet your ass that I believe any successful relationship is first based on friendship and mutual respect.

I’ve watched this dynamic since I opened my eyes and I respect my grandparents and their marriage of 66 years more than any of these short lived so called relationships of this century.

I am an extremely independent woman and there aren’t many things I can’t do on my own, but I can tell you from experience…I absolutely REFUSE to live in a household without a dynamic like my grandparents have, ever again. I don’t WANT to be equal to the man in  my life – that’s not the structure I desire. I want a man who can be a man, someone who desires to take care of me and protect me; not someone constantly hiding behind me and asking ME for direction? If I wanted that I would have been a switch hitter.

I am so confused by feminism, I guess specifically because I’ve never not “felt equal” to men? Maybe that’s because I was raised in the industries of a man and learned quick that in order to keep my place I needed to earn it? Who freaking knows.

All I know is this – women have created this skewed vision of the “modern woman” that is FUCKING THINGS UP!

We are all supposed to be put together, with perfect bodies and skin, stay up with the latest fashion, have high paying jobs, pay someone else to raise our kids, get educations, and bitch about the things men are doing wrong. We are supposed to rebel against EVERYfuckingTHING that is “typical” for a woman, too.

     Shave? OH no..fuck you, I’m a woman! I don’t have to do what you say! 

COOK? HA! You can cook your own dinner! Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean I have to cook for you! 

    Don’t open my door, I can do it myself! 

GIRL POWER! No one can tell us what to do with our bodies, let’s parade around half naked!

       NO! I won’t have an office job, I want a “mans job” …and I want paid just the same!

Have I already asked you to shoot me? If not…SHOOT ME ALREADY!

Do you know how embarrassing it is to be a woman in her 20’s these days?

Women have made feminism into something extreme that is going to greatly impact the younger generations – in a very negative way. They are single-handedly killing chivalry one “I’ll get my own door” at a time. They have completely taken the modesty and mystery out of, well, EVERYTHING – and they are getting MAD about the reactions it’s causing. Not to mention that whole equal pay business.

 

We are constantly downgrading men for being “dogs” and “players” …but won’t step back and see what’s made them this way.

We idolize people like Beyonce’ and Miley Cyrus but bent out of fucking shape when Trump says he wants to grab someone by the pussy?

Do I think it’s okay for a man to throw degrading words at a woman? HELL to the NO, and I’ll be the first one to say something if I see it happen..BUT…

You get what you put out into the world. Respect yourself and you will be respected.

Keep your kitten in her pants and well, maybe no one will try and pet the damn thing.

I’m fucking old school. I don’t fit the mold of any “stereotypical female” and I never will conform to one.I will always happily go into “wife mode” when chores need done and I’ll always happily roll up my sleeves when someone needs an extra hand. Instead of crying to my mommy if some asshole runs his mouth, I’m going to just bitch slap him and tell him what I think!( I’d also suggest you keep your “oh, but what if he overpowers you” thoughts to yourself unless you REALLY want to open that can of worms.) If I get another job, where I make less than the men at the company,(*note, this is the current situation for my job) I probably won’t ever say anything…because there is LIKELY a reason! AND…get this, if there isn’t…I’ll just leave.

I’ll also continue to uplift every woman I see, because these standards…these things that have made me be scared to be myself for so many years, they’re scary. They’re ruining the younger generation and killing a part of what made love and marriage so beautiful to begin with.

I don’t even know what the hell I’m talking about now…

I bet this stirs the shit pots of a LOT of folks out there.

Here’s to ya!

xoxo

OkieGirl

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

#RoadTo27 Day 2 – Change

Yesterday was day one of the newest DragonFit bootcamp round. I decided I was gong to fully commit this round, no half assing. I posted in our sisterhood group that I was going to do the “Mile For Time” challenge mentioned in our emails, and that I was going to crush my fastest mile. When I woke up this morning I had one thing on my mind – beating that time. I went to sleep thinking about it, I woke up thinking about it…I was going to do it.

I stretched and reached for my phone to check the time and the first thing I saw was a text from a girlfriend that said;

“Why am I afraid of change?!?!”

I sat there, phone in hand, trying to think of just what to tell her…

Because it’s scary! That’s why!!

What if you fail? What if you can’t do it? What if you lose friends? What if people mock you? What if…

…what if you succeed?

Over the last year I’ve made more changes than I can actually really wrap my head around. Small things like shaving off half my hair…and huge things like leaving my toxic marriage.

They were all scary, and they all caused exponential self growth. I’ve grown accustom to change, and I really like it – but it’s still very scary. I like it because I always grow and learn about myself, even if the change wasn’t necessarily “good”.

So, here’s my advice on change.

  • Embrace it, embrace the HELL out of it. It’s gonna be scary, but it’s going to be worth it.
  • Figure out what part of it is actually scaring you – for me, it’s often the fear of success.
  • Understand that every time you walk through a new door you’re going to lose people. Also understand that is perfectly okay. Most people we meet are just for certain phases of our lives, the ones who are meant to follow through each door will remain.
  • If there is someone who doesn’t support your change, they are NOT your tribe and you do not need them.
  • Seek positive energy and surround yourself with people who have similar goals and ambitions. It wasn’t until I did this that I really started to succeed.
  • Don’t worry about the thoughts of others. This is particularly true for lifestyle changes. When I started lifting like crazy and packing on muscle, I lost a lot of “friends” …that was my choice. No one get’s to decide what my body should look like but me!
  • LAUGH. When you hit a speed bump or completely screw up, laugh about it. Realize you’re human, find the light and just move forward.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask for help.Ever.
  • Find some consistency. Even if it doesn’t seem consistent, as long as you’re pushing towards your goals…you’re going to make the change permanent.
  • Don’t be afraid of failure. Failure is just in your head, there really are no failures…only lessons. Find the lesson and push forward. Readjust if you must, but keep moving towards the goal.
  • Get out of your own head. Don’t overthink it, just do it.

I think my last bit of advice on making change is this…

ALWAYS believe in yourself…and when you don’t, do it anyway.

I didn’t believe in myself when I stepped foot out to go on that run this morning. I knew there was NO way I was going to beat that time of 13:31…but I went out, and tried my damndest anyway.

I crushed it, by the way…by over 2 minutes.

You don’t always have to believe in yourself to create change, you just have to fight through the fear.

After all, on the other side of fear lies freedom.

14

xoxo

OkieGirl

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You ARE Enough.

I’m too fat.

I’m too thin.

My arms are flabby.

My thighs are too big.

I am built like a man.

I’m built like a stick.

I’m too heavy.

My butt is too big.

My butt is too small.

My boobs are uneven.

I’m not tan enough.

My hair isn’t long enough.

I’m not pretty enough.

I’m not enough.

Aren’t you heartbroken for the girls saying these things about themselves?

Don’t you say something like, “No you’re not, you’re beautiful and perfect and uniquely you!”

BUT aren’t you also guilty of saying these things to yourself? Maybe not out loud and maybe you don’t even realize you do it. When you are scrolling through your social media feed and you see a girl with a body you desire, what kind of thoughts run through your head?

Do you put yourself down because you don’t look like her? Do you say to yourself “I wish my butt looked that good” or “I wish my tummy was that thin” do you fill your head full of negative thoughts about how you will “never look that good”?? I know I was once guilty of this…and I know SO many of us are.

It’s hard not to desire what we see as a perfect body, or goal body, ESPECIALLY when we are working on ours. BUT it’s so, SO , sooo important to stay positive about your body image.

You have to love your body, it’s the only one you have! Instead of being envious of the girls you see – take pride in your OWN body and how it will look when you reach your goals. No one is perfect. Even the most fit girls have demons and body issues. I know the more weight I lose, the more critical I get of my body! It’s a vicious cycle and I have to stop and say, “NO! look how far you’ve come”.

It’s all a mind game…a mind game with yourself. You have to wake up each morning and think positive. You have to look in the mirror and refuse to pick yourself apart. You have to remember that your body is unique to only you. You need to focus on creating the best version of yourself – mentally and physically, not another version of someone else.

It’s hard to find yourself…but it’s even harder if you are constantly trying to be someone else.  Just do what makes you happy, try everything, go on adventures and LOVE yourself unconditionally.

You are beautiful.

You are important.

You matter.

You’re a freaking rockstar!!

xoxo

OkieGirl

2  4

 

 

 

 

All I Can Be Is Me.

Do you know how hard it is to be yourself in this day and age?

ESPECIALLY as a woman!

There is constantly someone, somewhere, telling you how to look, what to wear, what not to wear, how thin to be, how many muscles to have;

BLAH.

BLAH.

BLAH!!!

I can’t STAND it!

Advocating health and a fit body is one thing, but pushing girls to drastic measures (eating disorders, especially!) to fit in with some “standard” is just ridiculous.

I wish that instead of teaching young girls “how to dress” and “how to lose 10 pounds fast” that all these popular magazines and websites would teach self love, self respect, and how to live a HEALTHY lifestyle.

I was blessed to be raised in a home full of praise and positive vibes. I have always loved who I am, which is good, since that’s all I can be. Of COURSE we can always improve our bodies, minds and spirits…but I feel like society and social media are teaching women (especially young girls!) that who we are isn’t good enough.

We must paint our faces up and contour them, elongate our cheekbones and our lashes, make our noses smaller and our chins less defined. We must be skinny with a shapely butt and huge ta-ta’s, and if we aren’t that then we need to use clothes to trick others into believing we are.

SCREW. ALL. THAT

We are all unique, and that is what makes us who we are, which is what makes the human race and our world so bad ass.

SO, today, I want you to look in the mirror and compliment yourself…and I want you to do that tomorrow, and every day from now on.

We are all beautiful amazing crazy weird creatures…and if we don’t embrace that, we will surely lose it.

The only person you need to impress is yourself.

 

xoxo

OkieGirl