Ha! I Win!

I often feel like I repeat myself in these self improvement blogs…

“I used to be really overweight and hated my body…”

“I have actually always hated my body, and I don’t even know why…”

“I went through some really rough times and found myself using alcohol and food as an unsuccessful coping mechanism…”

I guess maybe I do repeat them because they’re relevant to where I am, who I am and why I am doing what I’m doing.

At 13 years old in the 7th grade all I wanted to do was be a cheerleader. I had no interest in any other sports, but for some reason I just really wanted to cheer. Maybe it’s because making others smile, getting them excited and supporting them is what’s hard stamped in my DNA…who knows, but I wanted it.

…this should be the part where I tell you I tried out, got the spot and cheered throughout school; or maybe where I didn’t make it and kept trying until I got it, but it’s not.

I never tried out. I, at 13 years old, thought I was too big to be a cheerleader.

Before Facebook, and Instagram…before the #fitfam was a thing…back in the day when 17 Magazine was all that existed for young girls to compare to, I genuinely believed I was too big to cheer. I don’t know that I ever thought of myself as “fat” per say, but up until a few months ago I always thought I was huge. Like, I felt like I took up a lot of space…

It wasn’t until my wonderful boyfriend held his arms out in front of him one day and said “Look, THIS is how big you are…this is where my arms touch when I hug you!” that I realized how incredibly ‘small’ I actually was, that was a tiny circle. However, I still saw a great big girl in the mirror …over the past year I have fought hard to change my perception of myself, and it’s finally worked. With constant self improvement, positive self talk and a lot of love and support from the best man in the world, it’s finally worked.

It REALLY clicked for me when I received an email from a friend and new client a couple weeks ago. I’ve looked up to her killer physique since I met her! I was noting her starting measurements when I realized we are almost the exact same size! I was baffled, blown away, dumbfounded…I had NEVER thought I could possibly be the same size as her!

Then…it finally happened. When I went to the gym for the first time last week I saw little ole me in the mirror. I didn’t see “great big unhealthy me” …I saw every change, every new visible muscle, every vein that used to be hidden…

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This was the first time I’d seen this girl staring back at me…the first time I actually just saw me for what I am. It was a proud moment, a relief that I’d finally overcome that altered image…that I was finally winning this battle!

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I no longer struggle to fit in my clothes, I no longer feel like I take up so much space, I no longer see that “bigger” version of me. I see the hard work, the dedication, the years of struggles and the triumphs; the obstacles I’ve overcome and everything that’s brought me here.  I have a positive view on the next steps of my journey, and am proud to finally be healthy.

I’m finally winning this battle with myself, after all in the end it is just you vs. you ….

xoxo

OkieGirl

 

#RoadTo27 Day 2 – Change

Yesterday was day one of the newest DragonFit bootcamp round. I decided I was gong to fully commit this round, no half assing. I posted in our sisterhood group that I was going to do the “Mile For Time” challenge mentioned in our emails, and that I was going to crush my fastest mile. When I woke up this morning I had one thing on my mind – beating that time. I went to sleep thinking about it, I woke up thinking about it…I was going to do it.

I stretched and reached for my phone to check the time and the first thing I saw was a text from a girlfriend that said;

“Why am I afraid of change?!?!”

I sat there, phone in hand, trying to think of just what to tell her…

Because it’s scary! That’s why!!

What if you fail? What if you can’t do it? What if you lose friends? What if people mock you? What if…

…what if you succeed?

Over the last year I’ve made more changes than I can actually really wrap my head around. Small things like shaving off half my hair…and huge things like leaving my toxic marriage.

They were all scary, and they all caused exponential self growth. I’ve grown accustom to change, and I really like it – but it’s still very scary. I like it because I always grow and learn about myself, even if the change wasn’t necessarily “good”.

So, here’s my advice on change.

  • Embrace it, embrace the HELL out of it. It’s gonna be scary, but it’s going to be worth it.
  • Figure out what part of it is actually scaring you – for me, it’s often the fear of success.
  • Understand that every time you walk through a new door you’re going to lose people. Also understand that is perfectly okay. Most people we meet are just for certain phases of our lives, the ones who are meant to follow through each door will remain.
  • If there is someone who doesn’t support your change, they are NOT your tribe and you do not need them.
  • Seek positive energy and surround yourself with people who have similar goals and ambitions. It wasn’t until I did this that I really started to succeed.
  • Don’t worry about the thoughts of others. This is particularly true for lifestyle changes. When I started lifting like crazy and packing on muscle, I lost a lot of “friends” …that was my choice. No one get’s to decide what my body should look like but me!
  • LAUGH. When you hit a speed bump or completely screw up, laugh about it. Realize you’re human, find the light and just move forward.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask for help.Ever.
  • Find some consistency. Even if it doesn’t seem consistent, as long as you’re pushing towards your goals…you’re going to make the change permanent.
  • Don’t be afraid of failure. Failure is just in your head, there really are no failures…only lessons. Find the lesson and push forward. Readjust if you must, but keep moving towards the goal.
  • Get out of your own head. Don’t overthink it, just do it.

I think my last bit of advice on making change is this…

ALWAYS believe in yourself…and when you don’t, do it anyway.

I didn’t believe in myself when I stepped foot out to go on that run this morning. I knew there was NO way I was going to beat that time of 13:31…but I went out, and tried my damndest anyway.

I crushed it, by the way…by over 2 minutes.

You don’t always have to believe in yourself to create change, you just have to fight through the fear.

After all, on the other side of fear lies freedom.

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xoxo

OkieGirl

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#LikeAGirl

Yesterday, amidst a random conversation, it was brought to my attention that not everyone can understand “why I want to look like a man”…

I know, stop laughing..I have a point to make here.

About a year ago I decided to take hold of the reins to my life and get healthy…I know, heaven forbid we do that in this day and age.

It just so happens that, my body LOVES to be strong…what’s that mean? It means I pack on muscle like a beast without really trying. Whatta you want from me – I’m genetically blessed to be a badass.28

As a woman in today’s society it’s a daily fight to try and fit in, to meet the “standards” set by Hollyweird and the fashion industries and shitty magazines that sell photo shopped images of girls who were actually already perfect to begin with.

I have struggled with a fucked up body image since about 5th grade …because I was around a foot taller than everyone in my class – EVERYONE. Somewhere around age 15 I began to embrace who I was…a tall weirdo who doesn’t do anything any of the other kids do.

I’m still that same girl. I’m doing things so many people see as “weird” or “wrong” …when in reality it’s just different.

Sure, most women don’t spend 7 days a week trying to build and perfect their bodies.

MOST women don’t care to sculpt the perfect delts and obliques.

WELL, guess what. I’m not most women.

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The reason I want to “look like a man” …is because THAT is how I was made to look. My body is simply developing the way it was supposed to. As a fellow bad ass bitch so perfectly stated…

“Listen, just because my body was developed for something other than fucking millionaires, doesn’t mean it’s masculine. I think it’s femininely badass as fuck because there’s not a single muscle on body that isn’t for a purpose because I’m not a do nothin’ bitch.” -Rousey

Having muscle and being strong DOES NOT MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A MAN!

If you think I “look like a man” cool! THANKS, I think you look like a fucking wet noodle…

BUT – the difference in you and I is integrity, confidence and a kind heart. I would never tell you that I thought you were overweight, or you were too thin…because IT’S YOUR BODY!

The fact that MEN can talk shit about strong women just tells me one thing -they’re fucking jealous.

They’re jealous of our drive, our ability to put in the work and get the results, our ability to obtain something that could never be purchased, only created.

If you think my body is dudely, great. If you think it’s feminine, great. If you don’t give a shit either way because it’s MY body and not yours – even freaking better.

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There are plenty of people putting others down, especially women – and it needs to stop.

We are so much more than our shells. We are all so much more than a nice body, or a pretty face. If you wanna lift the hell out of some weights and pack on muscle, DO IT! If you wanna do yoga, get thin and have a soft body..DO IT!

BUT whatever you do…never let what someone else thinks about you change your drive, or your self image.

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Love your body.

Love the journey.

Embrace the setbacks and the restarts.

Celebrate the triumphs and always move forward.

HUSTLE.

The dream won’t work unless you do.

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P.S. You can buy tits…traps must be earned.

Until then, forget it all and go lift like a girl.

xoxo

OkieGirl

 

Live Fit & Healthy.

As I was sitting on my bed last night writing down some goals and working on a new 21 day transformation program I’ll be doing…a lot of things occurred to me.

  • I’m sure not where I thought I’d be when I turned 26.
    • In some ways I’m proud of that, in others I’ve let myself down.
  • Making changes isn’t easy, but even small changes lead to big results with enough time.
  • I can’t do this on my own.
  • My life depends on this change.

Now that I’ve figured that out, I should be good to go right?

Right…that’s what I’ve said 1,000 times. I’ve “started” to get fit and healthy 1,000 times…I don’t even think I’m exaggerating!

But, this time I did one thing different.

I asked for help, for someone to join me…not just anyone though; my rock, my best friend, my everyday hero, my love, my biggest supporter…my husband.

You see, he’s never let me fail when I asked him for help.

He’s always pushed and supported me in ANY endeavor I’ve ever attempted (and believe me, there have been a LOT of them)….he has stood right beside me through every trial, every success and every failure!

I decided a few days before my 26th birthday that I wanted this year to be different. I don’t want to turn 27 next October, 11th and think…damn, I let another year get away! I want to look back and think “Look at all the incredible things we did this year!” I want to get healthy, the healthiest I have ever been…and I want to inspire others to do the same. I want to take adventures, and risks, and do things that scare me. I want to spend as much time as I can in nature, and learning new things. I want to hunt, and fish, and play in the mud any chance I get…and I want to take every tiny step I can to get a little bit closer to my ultimate goal.

I think as young people we need to realize that our health must come first. Our bodies deserve to run at peak levels. They deserve to be fueled with preservative and hormone free foods that actually benefit our well-being.

You don’t put fake gas in your car when you want it to run it’s best, now do you? So why would you put fake food in your body and expect premium results?

I think we over complicate things. We all want that “quick fix” …but no one really gives a damn about their health. Sit back and think about all the SHIT you’re putting into your body before you use another quick fix product…and then ask yourself why you’re overweight and unhealthy.

You do realize it’s YOUR fault, right? You are the one responsible for your body and taking care of it. The time to start giving a damn is now. Clean up your diet, cut out gluten and processed JUNK, stop drinking chemical concoctions (all of these lead to inflammation in the gut and body – by the way), eat single ingredient foods…get an accountability partner …and MOVE YOUR ASS!! I guarantee you things will begin to change.

That’s not just a note to you, it’s a note to me as well.

I plan on blogging throughout this venture…to share with you our ups and downs, and our progress in health, fitness and life.

I’ll try and share my favorite recipes and things that make it all easier (and cheaper) for us to live fit & healthy…after all, this is a lifestyle change not a quick fix.

Stay motivated, my friends…

xoxo

OkieGirl

You ARE Enough.

I’m too fat.

I’m too thin.

My arms are flabby.

My thighs are too big.

I am built like a man.

I’m built like a stick.

I’m too heavy.

My butt is too big.

My butt is too small.

My boobs are uneven.

I’m not tan enough.

My hair isn’t long enough.

I’m not pretty enough.

I’m not enough.

Aren’t you heartbroken for the girls saying these things about themselves?

Don’t you say something like, “No you’re not, you’re beautiful and perfect and uniquely you!”

BUT aren’t you also guilty of saying these things to yourself? Maybe not out loud and maybe you don’t even realize you do it. When you are scrolling through your social media feed and you see a girl with a body you desire, what kind of thoughts run through your head?

Do you put yourself down because you don’t look like her? Do you say to yourself “I wish my butt looked that good” or “I wish my tummy was that thin” do you fill your head full of negative thoughts about how you will “never look that good”?? I know I was once guilty of this…and I know SO many of us are.

It’s hard not to desire what we see as a perfect body, or goal body, ESPECIALLY when we are working on ours. BUT it’s so, SO , sooo important to stay positive about your body image.

You have to love your body, it’s the only one you have! Instead of being envious of the girls you see – take pride in your OWN body and how it will look when you reach your goals. No one is perfect. Even the most fit girls have demons and body issues. I know the more weight I lose, the more critical I get of my body! It’s a vicious cycle and I have to stop and say, “NO! look how far you’ve come”.

It’s all a mind game…a mind game with yourself. You have to wake up each morning and think positive. You have to look in the mirror and refuse to pick yourself apart. You have to remember that your body is unique to only you. You need to focus on creating the best version of yourself – mentally and physically, not another version of someone else.

It’s hard to find yourself…but it’s even harder if you are constantly trying to be someone else.  Just do what makes you happy, try everything, go on adventures and LOVE yourself unconditionally.

You are beautiful.

You are important.

You matter.

You’re a freaking rockstar!!

xoxo

OkieGirl

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Why I Quit Dieting.

This may be the most important blog I ever write!

For months and months now I spend somewhere between 5 and 20 hours a week researching, studying and absorbing fitness and nutrition information. I want to be a personal trainer and life changer…and I’m on track to do that. 

Anyone who has ever tried to lose an ounce of fat knows that it’s not easy, hell…anyone who has tried to gain knows the same. The reason is because nutrition is the most important part of any kind of health plan. It’s also the hardest part. Who wants to limit their foods, cut out whole food groups (which is detrimental to your health!) extremely restrict calories and be hungry all the time?! NO ONE!! These things lead to binges, create even MORE unhealthy habits and cause a landslide of health problems. I promise, I know.

The first thing I did was step away from EVERY single “diet trick” I thought I knew. I sat down outside one day and started thinking about how my grandparents ate when they were young. I even visited with my grandma about it. 

     “We didn’t have breakfast tarts and oatmeal in a packet. We ate what we had and what was in the garden.” She said. 

BOOM! That is when it hit me. Eating isn’t for fun, it’s not a social affair…it’s simple sustainability. We have to eat to live, and we have to eat the right things to live well.

I knew from the get go I wasn’t getting enough protein. Around 50g a day for a girl who is pushing 6′ tall is laughable, especially since I lift heavy. My first change was ordering some quality protein and drinking that every morning. 

My second step was to log that into my lose it app.

Third step – forget about the damn calories for a second and focus on the macronutrients of what you’re eating. Depending on your body and your goals you need a specific ratio of protein, carbs and fat each day. Don’t get me wrong, the calories are important…but where they come from is even more important. I have known for a while that my body prefers fat over carbs for readily available energy so, after using an IIFYM (if it fits your macros {macronutrients – carbs, fat, protein}) calculator to figure out my macro count for my goals…I adjusted the fat and carbs a little and never looked back.

I know it may seem daunting to log everything you eat, but the beauty of it is you can eat WHATEVER you want, as long as you hit your macro goals. I usually have my day logged before lunch, so I am not bothered by it unless I need to make adjustments. It’s not about eating exactly 171g of protein, either. IIFYM is also referred to as flexible dieting, because it’s flexible! No Tupperware to carry around and no cancelling a lunch date because your girls are going somewhere that has food “you can’t eat”!! 

I’m not saying you should get all your macros from junk, but I am saying that having some now and then isn’t going to kill you…it’s gonna save you…or it will me at least. Keep in mind, about 90% of my diet is compromised of whole unprocessed foods and LOTS of veggies, but sometimes I indulge! As far as “clean eating” goes; yesterday I ate like shit. Nachos for lunch, a pop tart at like 4 and 2 glasses of wine…but with breakfast and dinner I hit my macros! 

I think for me IIFYM has taken the guesswork out of it. I am energized, I don’t feel guilty for what I eat, I can “cheat” and still reach my goals…and it’s DOABLE!

I quit dieting because I found IIFYM, and because I found it…I’m now reaching my goals!! 

So…I suggest you do a little research in IIFYM and give it a try. It has been a game changer…maybe even a life changer, for me. 

I plan to write another blog with tips and “how I do it” but I hope this inspires you for now!!

Feel free to send me questions, if I can’t answer them…I am sure I can send you to someone who can! OkieGirlFit@hotmail.com 

XoXo

OkieGirl

Some of my favorite flexible dieters on Instagram: @breilly728 @w_navafitness @betteraskrile @brittany_dawn_fitness @jessi_jean_fitness @theswolebarbie