Today started out okay…I was a little tired but other than that felt pretty good. I got to work and everything was gravy, and out of nowhere I just had a breakdown. I’m talking like body shaking, heart racing, fingers tingling fighting back tears type breakdown. I have never felt so out of control…and it was scary.
I struggled through my work and left at noon. I knew I had to do something to get through this overbearing anxiety, so I headed to my squat rack. I just kept squatting and adding weight, over and over and over. I added more weight than I have ever squatted before (double what I have ever done, actually)…afterwards I felt SO good. I was beaming with pride because I had squatted 140 pounds 13 times after probably 100 (or more) lower weight squats. I was sweaty, exhausted and relieved. I had won.
I came inside, fixed a good lunch and relaxed. I was scrolling through Instagram looking through my favorite fitness pages when I INSTANTLY started picking apart my body in my head. My accomplishments had disappeared and I forgot about how crazy awesome my legs looked after my squat sesh.
What. The. Hell.
At what point in my life did I become not good enough? At what point did I lose pride in who I am and my body? It was only today that I realized…I AM one of those fit girls. I am SO strong…not because I have always worked out, but because I have always worked. The beginning of my fitness journey is some peoples middle. I am lifting more at the VERY beginning than some people ever will. I’m not trying to brag, but am just trying to make a point.
We must not compare ourselves to others!!!
You are your own person, and you must stay true to that. Sure, you should find people to look up to and get inspired by…but choose people who are also beautiful on the inside. Choose someone who inspires you to be a better PERSON, not just have a better body. Find women who are confident for the right reasons, and ones who put of a vibe that makes you feel good.
I know it’s hard not to feel like you’re good enough – I PROMISE , I do! BUT, you are! You are perfect, amazing and uniquely you.
Stay true, do you and be you – unapologetically!
…and if all else fails, squat it out!
Following are some of my favorite Instagram accounts of truly beautiful and inspirational women, feel free to share those who inspire you!
I am sure there are some I’m forgetting!